Weight

Why am I so much faster down every significant gradient when Paul
weighs at least 2 stone more than me ? He refuses to disclose precise
weights. My aerodynamics must be much better ?

Why do so many snails try to cross the road ? And do any make it ?

To Cruddington - Cheshire

Repeat performance from the weather - threatening showers all day but
rarely delivering. A few light headwinds but nothing to worry about.
We started slow as Paul's muscles and my knees seem to take time to
warm up. However, Costa's in Lancaster finally stopped Paul whingeing
about the lack of cake. We therefore ended up having a sandwich lunch
in Costa's in Preston before pushing on. The A49 was a great route and
we were flying. But then I got a puncture near Wigan and got stung by
something nasty as soon as I stopped. We changed the tube in record
time but were delayed by the nutters we seem to attract - bearing in
mind that we were on the A49 and busy changing a tyre, a long
description of how we could go up past the chip shop, do a zig-zag, go
behind the bookies, through the park and then get on the A49 left me
dumbfounded. So I assured him I understood every word whilst thinking
"why don't I just stay on the A49..... Leave me alone ! "

We made great progress through the afternoon and are intending to try
for a big day tomorrow. The waitress in the pub was a little confused
by our rehydration strategy of ordering 4 pints at a time to avoid
delays - we assured her that our 2 friends were on their way but
wouldn't be eating.

Stats: 90 miles. Average 14.6. 1 puncture. 1 insect attack.

Times Paul dropped my uninsured Iphone on a hard surface : Once

Times he will ever touch it again : Nil.

To Kendal

A much better day - at least for me. We left Lockerbie in the rain
which was forecast to last all day, but in fact it cleared up quickly
and we only got a couple of light sprinklings all day. It was a very
easy and pleasant ride to Carlisle where we had coffee and a panini.

The next section in to Penrith was also great, but Paul started
bonking. These Northern lasses .... But seriously, he had emptied the
tank completely - which was what happened to me yesterday. I think he
is quite pleased to share an affliction with endurance athletes. We
tried to cure it with a steak and ale pie at a pub in Penrith and then
decided to check whether it worked by riding up Shap Fell, which we
think will be the highest point on the trip at over 1,500ft. He is not
convinced it was a complete success but declined the offer to eat a
burger and try it again.

I tried to beat the speed record on the way down and failed miserably.
I can't move my legs fast enough to pedal beyond about 37mph and the
gradient only upped that to 39. It was then generally downhill to
Kendal, where we celebrated by eating traditional English food -
dansak and dupiaza.

Stats: 80 miles. Average 13.7.
Observations: 1. English cows smell much worse than Scots cows. 2. Is
telling your friend that you have decided not to let your new
boyfriend pursue his unnatural sexual practices really appropriate if
done loudly on a mobile when you are having Sunday lunch with your own
2 young daughters ? Hmmm.....

Do I look fat in this ?

Back in England - Paul

To Lockerbie

A difficult day. We got off to a late start as Paul rechecked and
fixed his tubes and tyres. We took advantage of the Travelodge being
on a retail park - the bikes were filthy so we washed them off at the
petrol station and Paul got his tyre back up to full pressure at Evans
Cycles.

We were on the road about 10.15 - out past Ibrox Park and some type of
Orange style march getting started. We headed for East Kilbride in
lovely sunny weather. My bottle cage collapsed but fortunately the
bottle didn't get crushed by the car behind. The cage was replaced at
Halfords 10 minutes later. The route was much hillier than we
expected, but improved as we headed to Strathaven - an attractive
small town. We then reached the B road which runs parallel to the M74
and things started getting very tough - still hilly, with strong
headwinds which made it tough even going downhill. There were a few
light showers which made it even more grim. Luckily the last 20 miles
or so were mainly downhill - I was wasted by then so was very grateful
for that. Also, for the first time, my saddle feels like a medieval
torture device. Nasty.

We will be out of Scotland tomorrow morning. Everyone has been so
helpful that we feel obliged to thank all the B&B landladies, Kyle who
drove us up to JoG, Chris at Travelodge for looking after our bikes,
Evans Cycles in Braehead, the charity raincoat man in the Landrover
and particularly the cyclist who guided us all the way from Govan to
Braehead when we got lost. The beer in the Highlands was excellent and
we are willing to accept that we probably chose the wrong places in
Glasgow and Lockerbie.

The pic may look a little grim but it seems appropriate as it was only
taken as an excuse to escape the wind for a few
minutes.
Stats: 81 miles. Average 13.1. 2 very tired cyclists.